The Last Temptation of Christ: Seeded Grapes

You want that sweet grape nectar so badly you might just make a terrible decision.

The normal seedless grapes are priced at something like $3.29 per lb.

And being the smart consumer you are, you know this represents an overpay.

But you are desperate to experience the unique joy that comes from squeezing a grape between your teeth.

That’s when you think you see salvation.

Seeded grapes: $1.99 per lb.

A near 40% price reduction seems like a fair discount for an unequivocally inferior product.

If, btw, a merchant ever prices seeded and seedless grapes the same, or, God forbid, charges more for seeded grapes, immediately hide your money and run in the opposite direction for you know said merchant is, to put it kindly, shady.

As for those discount seeded grapes, don’t do it. Don’t ever do it. Even at a 100% discount (i.e., free), we think passing is wise.

Because nearly all the fun that so defines the consumption of grapes erodes when the bite isn’t a smooth process, when the final 15% of the experience leaves you wondering what is in my mouth? Is it ok to spit it out? Is it safe to swallow this thing?

So while we’d never advise paying $3.29 per lb., it’s a remarkably better outcome than being duped into seeded grapes.

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